The Caddie Cup

THE CADDIE CUP: Fall 2025

Tournament Date: Saturday, November 1st (Mark your calendars, or we’ll mark you as absent.) 

First Tee Time: 10:30 AM (Be there. Be early. Be sober. Mostly.) 

Meeting Time: 9:45 AM on the Patio - with beverage in hand.

Location: Spring Creek Golf Club, Louisa, VA (A course so beautiful, you’ll barely notice your horrible golf game.)

Fees: $100 includes Golf, Cart, Range Balls

Junk Bets: $25 - Venmo your monies (if you don't have Venmo, let the organizing committee know)

The Inaugural Battle of the Bogeymen

History is about to be made, or at the very least, a lot of decent turf is about to be ruined! We are thrilled—and slightly terrified—to announce the inaugural Caddie Cup set for the fall of 2025. This highly anticipated (by them) tournament pits two fun-loving, yet aggressively unskilled, squads against each other in a battle for golf supremacy, or at least a firm handshake and car keys.

The Contenders

1. The Bhattalion Swingers Golf (BSG): A team named after a glorious military unit, the "Bhattalion," which, in this context, refers to a group that has bravely fought the golf ball and lost every battle. Their team motto is reportedly, "We may not score well, but we have the highest potential for catastrophic slice." Look out for their signature move: the "Bhattalion Blast," where a drive is hit so hard and so high that it enters the local air traffic control's radar system.

2. The SGA (Swing-Impaired Golfers Association... probably): The SGA is a group united by their deep and abiding commitment to finding every single "natural hazard" on the course. Their game is less about hitting a flagstick and more about hitting the correct continent. They pride themselves on having a different favorite club every hole, because every club is equally likely to fail them. Their signature play is the "SGA Scramble," where four guys spend ten minutes looking for one ball only to realize it was resting comfortably on a nearby cart path.

The Forecast

Expect high scores, low standards, and a severe shortage of regulation golf balls by the 10th tee. The winner of this cup will likely be the team that demonstrates the most creative use of a foot-wedge and the most convincing argument that the tree they hit was "clearly in the wrong place."

May the least bad golfer prevail, and may the 19th hole be fully stocked. We'll see you in the rough!

⛳ CADDIE CUP: Official Rules and Regulations 📜

I. The Cardinal Rule: Thou Shalt Not Sandbag

HONEST HANDICAPS ONLY. We are playing for NET scores, and your handicap is the cornerstone of this friendly, yet ruthlessly competitive, event.

• The Shame Clause: Anyone caught manipulating their handicap for nefarious, self-serving purposes (i.e., cheating) will be subject to immediate, loud, and unrelenting public shaming on every tee box. You will be forever known as Gary, the Guy Who Cheated at the Caddie Cup. Don't be Gary.

• Proof of Competence (or Lack Thereof): Your handicap will be marked on the score card. If you don't have a GHIN or Grint, send your last 10 honest scores, along with the course and tees played, to the Organizing Committee (i.e., the poor soul who has to calculate them) so we can determine your official "Get Out of Jail Free" number.

II. The Format: A Beautiful, Brutal 10-on-10 Team Embrace

This is a five-front WAR decided by a total of five 18-hole matches.

A. Match Play Setup

• The Team Love: We have 5 matches of 2-v-2 Better Ball Match Play.

• The Partnership Promise: All four players play their own ball. Your team's score on a hole is the LOWER NET SCORE of the two partners. (One of you must step up, or you both wallow in failure.)

• The Objective: The 2-v-2 pair must win more holes than their opponents over the 18 holes.

B. The Overall Team Score

Points are awarded to the overall team (BSG or SGA):

• There are 20 points available for a pairing to win.  

• Points awarded: 

1 point - win the hole

.5 points - tie a hole

2 points for winning the overall match

• points are added for your overall team score.  

• There are 20 points per foursome for a total of 100 points.  50.5 points wins the tournament.

• Match Tie: An 18-hole tie is like a participation trophy—a sweet, unsatisfying 0.5 points for both overall teams.

• Victory Condition: The first team to reach a total of 3 points wins the magnificent CADDIE CUP.

C. The Tie-Breaker

If the overall score ends in a 50-50 tie:

1. The Scorecard Séance (If the Light Fades): The winner will be determined by a sudden-death scorecard playoff (comparing the scores of the tied matches, starting with the hardest handicap hole).

2. The Chip-Off of Instant Heartbreak (If the Sun Shines): If time and courage allow, we may opt for an immediate, high-pressure, potentially embarrassing Chip-Off on the 18th green to decide the champion.  Bring your sand wedge!!!

III. The Rules of Engagement (Leniency is Love)

We want you to succeed (or at least, we want to watch you try).

• Lift and Place: Your Personal Oasis: Lift and Place is in effect everywhere! Your ball deserves a clean lie. Pick it up, wipe the mud off, and whisper sweet nothings before placing it down.

• The Club-Length Cuddle: You are granted the divine right to move your ball one (1) club length—1 seven iron length—without improving the lie. You must remain in the same geological disaster. No teleporting from the rough to the fairway! This is for minor adjustments, not miracles.  Also we dont need anyone ruining clubs on roots, and or more likely, hurting themselves. 

• Red Stake Rules -

  •  you have a choice of playing the ball without improving your lie, as per above rule with no penalty.    

  • you can move the ball out of the penalty area laterally 2 club lengths with a 1 stroke penalty

• White Stake Rule

  • you must move your ball out laterally to 2 club lengths and take a 1 stroke penalty

• Water Hazard Rule

  • Move the ball back from the line of entry as far back as you want for a preferred lie

• Holing Out: A Commitment to Closure: All Balls MUST BE HOLED OUT. We are here to witness the ball drop.

  • The Concession: The only exception is if the opposing team shouts, screams, or otherwise clearly and loudly declares, “IT'S GOOD!” This means they concede the putt, admitting it’s too close for you to possibly miss (or, more likely, they're tired of watching you line up a 1-footer.

• Drop Zones

  • These are on the other side of the madness, on 5 there is a designated drop zone at the end of the3 bridge,  on the other holes, drop it near the forward tees.

    1. number 1

    2. number 5

    3. number 10

    4. number 13

    5. number 16

IV. The Prize Pool (Sharing the Wealth and the Weirdness)

The stakes are real. The cash is... adequate.

 Prize Category Winning Amount Description

Caddie Cup Champions $300 Split among the 10 heroic winners of the overall team competition.

Lowest Net Score (18 Holes) $10 Awarded to the single player with the lowest total NET SCORE for the entire round. You, my friend, are the MVP of the day.

Longest Drive (Hole 12) $10 A true bomb, but it must be in the fairway. We're celebrating length and control, not a desperate search party in the woods.

Closest to the Pin (Hole 8) $10 A perfect iron shot on this par 3. Get close enough to feel the warmth of the hole cup, or at least close enough that the group behind you can't hear your tears when you miss the tap-in.

Longest Putt (Hole 18) $10 The most spectacular, improbable, and utterly desperate putt on the final green.

Highest Net Score (18 Holes) $10 The "We're Glad You Came" Award. Paid to the individual with the highest 18-hole net score. We love you just the way you are.

Skins $? All remaining cash goes to Skins, which are won by the single, un-tied lowest NET score on each hole.

Go forth, swing hard, and remember: we love you, but we will absolutely talk about your bad shots later.